Yes! Yes! Yes! I was at Wrestlemania 28... but only for a short while
Kane vs. Orton (Falls Count Anywhere)
Recap feud on Smackdown
Lead pipe used early, out into crowd, soft power slam by
Kane on Orton on the concrete floor, fight into locker room, Zack Ryder
interferes, Kane chucks a catering trolley at Orton’s head (clearly no
concussion issues then!), Orton takes control as they head back to the ring,
Orton goes chair crazy on Kane, Orton hits a DDT off the announce table, Orton
superplex off the top rope, choke slam reversal off attempted RKO, RKO onto the
chair after attempted tombstone onto the chair.
Winner: Orton
Kane jobs again after winning at Wrestlemania 28. 2 losses
in a row to Orton so I assume this feud is over. Does this clear Orton for a
run at the title? Who can Kane lose to next?
Johnny and Eve make fun of Teddy. Love the giant name tag
on Teddy.
Funkasaurus w/ Hornswoggle vs. Dolph Ziggler w/ Vikcy and
suited up Jack Swagger
PPV debut match for Brodus? I was watching him from a year
ago as Del Rio’s body guard and he was so much more menacing. I hate how they
claim Ziggler was a former world champion. How long was it? 5 minutes on a
Smackdown episode? Ziggler gets the upper hand with interference by Swagger and
good offense by Ziggler. Splash and 3 count for Brodus.
Winner: Funkasaurus
Intercontinental Championship: Big Show vs. Cody Rhodes
(Tables Match)
Everyone hates Teddy... even Cody Rhodes!
Recap Wrestlemania 28 match with extended highlights.
Show all slap happy on Cody. Show shuts down every minor
attack by Rhodes. Show accidently steps through a table and loses the title.
LOL! You could see it coming a mile off but clever end to the match especially
because they were saying there was no way Cody could win. Show puts Cody
through a couple of tables just for fun.
Winner: Cody Rhodes
Reminds me of Sheamus’ win over Cena when Cena fell through
the table at TLC a couple of years back. Love Cole talking up the heel
ridiculously.
Daniel Bryan interview with Matt Striker: he has a cooler
beard! Yes! Yes! Yes! AJ looking sad and lonely
World Heavyweight Championship: Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan
(2 out of 3 Falls)
Recap of AJ bashing and angry Sheamus on Smackdown
Fall 1
Sheamus out wrestles Bryan in the early stages with a
surprise submission hold (Texas Clover Leaf?). Let’s Go Bryan vs. 18 Seconds
chant going. Bryan grounds Sheamus with an arm bar/shoulder submission. Sheamus
hits some quick, power moves to regain control. Drop toe hold and Bryan back in
control. Bryan softening up Sheamus’ shoulder around the ring post for the Yes
lock. Bryan won’t stop kicking Sheamus’ shoulder when in the ropes. Ref DQs Bryan.
Winner: Sheamus by DQ (Sheamus 1 – Bryan 0)
Fall 2
Bryan drop kick and locks in the Yes lock. Sheamus passes
out. Fall to Bryan.
Winner: Bryan (Sheamus 1 – Bryan 1)
Fall 3
Yes chant led by Bryan as doctors check out Sheamus. Cole amazed
at strategy? Clearly hasn’t seen many iron man matches then because it is
classic heel strategy. Sheamus wants to continue. Brogue kick out of nowhere to
Bryan and slow cover – 2 count! Solid inziguri to Sheamus – 2! Bryan misses
with the Benoit head butt. Brogue kick and the final fall.
Winner: Sheamus (Sheamus 2 – Bryan 1)
I didn’t think that WWE would be smart enough to go with the
popular Bryan but a good match to lose regardless. Sheamus looked tough and
Bryan showed why he was a former champion. Let’s hope he can continue to stay
at the top of the pile as he has proven that he belong there!
Jobbers on TV as Santino watches with Kahli
Chatty Jobbers vs. Ryback
Stop talking you fools! Can someone squash these guys
already! 2>1 except if you fight Ryback. LOL: Goldberg chant. Ryback dismantles
both jobbers with every finishing move he has and pins both jobbers at once.
Winner: Ryback
Matt Striker interviews CM Punk: home town reminiscences
WWE Championship: CM Punks vs. Chris Jericho (Chicago
Street Fight)
Recap of drinking and shenanigans on Raw
Singapore cane leads to ECW chant as Punk dominates early. Thumb
to the eye allows Jericho to hit some offense on the outside. Jericho exposes
the turn buckle as fight continues in the ring. Punk’s ‘sister’ slaps Jericho
and allows Punk to go back on the attack. Punk clears the announce tables and
puts Jericho through a table cover. Jericho uses a TV monitor and table cover
on Punk. Still wondering: what makes a Chicago street fight different from
other street fights? Punk slips on ropes during springboard. Jericho gets a
beer can from under the ring: anyone for a drink? Jericho wants a second drink.
Punk would prefer some kendo stick strikes instead. GTS and Walls of Jericho reversed.
Jericho crotches Punk (happened in almost every match tonight!). Punk hits the
macho man elbow from the top rope. Lionsault reversed into GTS reversed into
Irish whip into the chair. Jericho hits code breaker into lion tamer/walls on
Punk. Punk reaches ropes, grabs fire extinguisher and blinds Jericho and uses
it as a weapon. Punk from the top rope through Jericho on the Spanish announce
table (that’s a big jump and he only just made it). 2 count rolled through into
anaconda vice but broken with kendo stick to the skull. This is awesome chant
from the crowd. Code breaker onto the chair – 2! Jericho attempts a GTS on
Punk, reversed into catapult onto exposed turn buckle and Punk hits the GTS for
the win.
Winner: Punk
Good match with a decent use of weapons and some nice
reversals. The spot through the Spanish announce table was dangerous and the
end apt. But this still begs the question: why bring back Jericho only to lose
at the Rumble, Elimination Chamber and Wrestlemania? Apparently he has a tour of
Europe coming up but his comeback has been totally ruined. It’s not that he has
wrestled badly: his matches have been good and the last two PPV matches with
Punk have been entertaining but he has now lost all credibility as a main event
talent. He clearly won’t win the championship any time soon so why should I
care about him? This is a sad turn of events for one of the best wrestlers
around today.
Divas Championship: Bella Twin vs. Layla
Layla is returning after a bad knee injury that kept her out
for a year: I didn’t notice she was gone. Is she still a heel? The flawless jacket
is still there so I hope so. This match reminds me why the Divas are so crap:
they can barely chain wrestle. Layla hits the neck breaker on the other twin
for the win.
Winner: Layla
Not sure why they denied Beth a chance to take the longest
reign of this championship for this dull fare.
Matt Striker fails to get the scoop on Johnny’s chat with
HHH. HHH is back on RAW: he must be feeling unloved as he needs to show
everyone up on TV.
John Cena vs. Brock Lesnar (Extreme Rules – anything goes)
Video recap of feud: Brock is a self ass who doesn’t like
Cena. Maybe he should learn to rise above hate. Is this his heel turn? Can Edge
reinvigorate the leader of the Cenation?
Competing Cena chants. Commentators discuss how Lesnar
shouldn’t crap in his own back yard. Cena comes out with a chain: that means he
is ready to fight! Lesnar ground and pound on Cena and busts him open early.
Looks like Lesnar thinks he is still in an UFC ring as Cena gets medical
attention. They replay the shots that cut him open: those were vicious elbows
to the head. German suplexes to Cena and ref bump. Arm bar by Lesnar to further
brutalise Cena. Lesnar grabs the chain but doesn’t need it. Now he uses the
chains to tie up Cena’s legs and into a big clothes line. Lesnar hangs Cena up
on the ring post and works on his shoulder further. Cena hits two punches and
is once again tossed aside. Lesnar throws the ref back into the ring. AA
reversed into an F5 but ref bump only for 2! Lesnar beats up the new ref and
introduces the steel steps. Arm and shoulder submission on Cena but Lesnar
lifted up and slammed on steps. Cena from the top rope misses a leg drop as
Lesnar recovers. Lesnar blows out knee charging at Cena but Cena has the chain
in his hands. KO punch to Lesnar with the chain. AA on steps for the 3 count!
Winner: Cena
Not sure this was the best outcome. Lesnar was dominant but
super Cena once again pulls out the win. Maybe Lesnar is leaving soon after all
because this makes him look like an idiot. Cena makes an I’m going to be fired
speech (or maybe I’m badly injured speech).
